pandang belakang

met HD for lunch today. he sms’d about 9:30am in the morning to say that it was my birthday week and “lunch please”.

i replied to say let’s meet today since Bubbs had a lunch appointment already and so we did.  said he hasn’t gotten me a present and i said it’s ok ‘cos he had 2 hrs from morning till lunch to get something.  then he said he didn’t have time and i would’ve let the issue drop but he brought it up during lunch again.  said he saw this nice jabra bluetooth earpiece with interchangeable colours that he wanted to get for me.  so i said he has the whole of next week since i’ll be in Manila.

i really don’t think he means to get me anything… at least not now.  but i didn’t like the way he tried to “action action” that’s why i thanked him in advance for the gift. :p some people ought to be taught a lesson.

went to this japanese restaurant at boat quay for lunch.  was pleasantly surprised we both thought of the same place, though he doesn’t know it… but then again, the food was disappointing.  bleah.

sometimes i wonder why i even bother with HD.  his behaviour and the things he say are highly questionable at times but somehow… just ‘cos he’s usually open and frank with me, i’m more than willing to overlook his flaws.  sigh.

will not pandang belakang.

Opportunity Cost

My hairstylist was nice.  Charged me $16 (that’s the cost of a shampoo and wash) even though she re-coloured my hair a nice red.  Yay!  Am happy.  Sacrified my curls tho’… the back of my hair is kinda straight now… though the sides are still curly.  Sigh.  Why can’t we have the best of both worlds?

Jangan Pandang Belakang

Heard about this M’sian horror flick from Iceman… supposed to be real scary so i wanted to watch… unfortunately, the run ends on Wed and my days are booked all the way till after my Manila trip.  Hence… although saya mahu tonton Jangan Pandang Belakang tapi tidak ada masa.  🙁

Anyway, guess it’s not a bad thing to jangan pandang belakang (don’t look back).  One needs to always keep walking ahead ya?

Anyone got the DVD for the movie?


Got a nice song from Ally McBeal / Vonda Shepard to share – What Becomes of the Broken Hearted.  The lyrics are a lot more forward looking (jangan pandang belakang – get it?) than what the title implies.  Haha.


Control Freak


Argh!  I’m STILL pissed off about the state of my hair.  Hair is something that i’ve been obsessive compulsive about since young.  If it takes me 30x to tie my hair before it turns out the way i want it to look, i will do it.  Now i want nice curls AND nice hair colour and i want it by the time my birthday swings by in 2 days’ time.  If my current hairstylist, Yuki, can’t give me a solution by Mon night, then i’m moving on to another stylist.  I’ve taken leave from work on my birthday anyway.  If i need to spend the entire day in a hair salon to get the look i want, i will.  When it comes to my hair, money is so NOT an issue.  And you can bet my current stylist will be losing a “big account” if i decide to dump her!

Was feeling kind of down over the weekend.  So i was moping over HD.  But now, i’m just pissed.  Maybe i should be evil and spill the beans on all the mean things he has said about his best friend… or perhaps on the reputation damning things he has done before… hmmm…

Don’t understand why i was so hung up over him anyway.  *Rolls eyes*.  People who say they will celebrate my birthday and do not keep their word will not be so easily forgiven.  Yeap.  Never piss me off. 

Pui to Yuki, pui to HD, and if that stupid XLN says something hypocritcal to me in office again (like saying she likes my curls AFTER they’ve disappeared ‘cos of the stupid colouring), i’ll give her a slap on her stupid face.

Really Pissed Off

Now i’m REALLY annoyed with my hair.  First, the curls are almost all gone after the colour + highlight!  And the thing that pisses me off most is that i don’t even like the bloody colour!  Argh!  So i’m going to re-colour tomorrow night… which is almost a guarantee that ALL the curls will be gone… then how?  Wah lau.  WTF?  Curl again and have the colour change again?  ARGH!  How to get everything solved by my birthday!!?!?!?!?!?  ARGH!!!!!!!

Only the Lonely


Worked late tonight.  Was in office till 10:30pm.. but at least i finished all the work that needed to be done by tonight, and started on some work that can be delayed till Mon.

Original plan was to go to Eon canteen at 6:30pm, then cellgroup at 8:30pm.  But due to the influx of work, i ended up joining Buddy and friends at Cafe Iguana at 11pm.

Had 1 macho size Mango Margarita and 1 normal glass of Lime Margarita.  Was yummy but expensive!  Had to save my cash to take cab home so Buddy paid for me first.  Met YQ’s gf, who’s working at Equity Plaza… hehe… and i very thick-skinnedly asked her to help me check if she could get season parking.  😛  She’s with a trade credit insurer… and this saves me from asking her colleague, whom i don’t really know anyway.

Sigh.  Am really tired… but i actually enjoyed working late the past few nights.  I like to clear work at night when it’s quiet and the few colleagues who are closer to me are all staying late too.  Staying late in office is a good way to have company around, but yet not company that u need to entertain – i.e. make small talk with.  Certainly beats going home and feeling restless and down.  An empty mind is the devil’s workshop u know!

HD is in Jakarta this weekend… i think he’ll be there from Fri to Sun.  Have to admit that i miss his company though i do wonder if things turned out the way they did ‘cos of divine intervention.  Whatever the case, there are times when i’m ok, and there’re times when i wished he was around.  Breaking bad habits require time u know…

I finally feel that age is catching up with me.  It’s a sad thought but in all honesty, i don’t look forward to being by myself for the rest of my life.  It’s going to be a lonely path u know… given that i’m an only child and it’s just a matter of time when i might just be alone.

Rube commented last night that AKKK is starting to behave more and more like an older brother than a cousin.  But at the end of the day, he’ll still NOT my bro right?  I have close cousins that i know will be there for me… but it’s still not the same.

Sometimes i comfort myself by saying that God is fair – He gives good friends to those who are lonely.  But ultimately, i know that being an only child, my parents will be my, and my sole responsibility.  It is time to grow up.

Acid Bar

Went to Acid Bar with Azure, AKKK, and AKKK’s pseudo gf.  Rube joined us later.  Had a relatively good time.

AKKK still remembers the last time we were at Acid Bar together – that was when Zounds and i bumped into him when we were about to leave and ended up having quite a few rounds of drinks, and loads of good conversation with AKKK.  That was also the revival of my friendship with AKKK.

Anyhow, i’m tired.  Physically and emotionally.  It’s good to work hard and play hard.  But it’s darn tiring too.  Emotionally… i do wish to believe that all’s not over… but maybe it’s easier if that was the case.  Katrine – i’m not a good poker player.

Buay Song!

Am very unhappy.  Went to colour and highlight my hair today.  But the base colour came out too dark, and the blonde highlights, instead of being blonde… turned out gold!!

This is the colour combi i HATE, DETEST & DESPISE the most.  I always think this is a guy’s hair colour combi… it’s so masculine.  YUCKS!  PUI!  Can’t stand it. 

Was so annoyed that i decided not to shop in the 2 hr time gap to my dental appointment, and called a cab and came home instead.  Yeap.  That’s how vain i am.  I refuse to walk around town with ugly hair colour and i can’t stand waiting in the queue for a cab either.

Called my hairdresser to complain.  Told her the blonde was too gold and i want to re-colour.  Arranged for it to be done on Mon evening.  (The urgency is ‘cos it pains me to think that i’ll have ugly hair colour on my BIRTHDAY!!!  I mean… my birthday is practically a sacred festival!  Ugly hair colour will NOT be tolerated!)

Asked her for a discount and she said we’ll discuss on Mon.  I’m not unreasonable.  I don’t expect her to do work for free since hair colour is something that is not entirely in her control.  But i certainly expect a discount!  Esp. for all the business i’ve been giving her!


Gotta go for my dental appointment soon.  Grr….

Oh… another complaint… the N95 batt life is short… which is fine since we all know about that… but the way the batt signal drops is amazingly… like… from 5 bars to 1 bar in 10min.  Nuts man!


P.S. Just occurred to me that if i ever have a bf, he can probably forget about our anniversary, can skip celebrating V-day, but if he fogets my birthday… he’ll be dead meat.  THAT is how important my birthday is to me!

Female Privileges

Yesterday, i got a call from my client…

Client: Xiao Jie, your spreadsheet got mistake uh. Thanks for saving me some premium leh.

Me: Huh? Really? Where? I’ll go double-check…

Client: Yeah, u go check the first line of your spreadsheet. Cannot see the mistake then i take it as i save money on premium.

I checked and i checked. But i still couldn’t see what was wrong! At first i thought my cell formula was wrong.. but it wasn’t! In the end, desperate, i called my client back.

Client: Let’s see… u saved me $600+… not bad… i can go buy a N95.

Me: Er, sorry lah. Tell me what’s wrong leh… sorry lah… don’t sabo leh.

Client: If i wanted to sabo u, i would’ve sent the email to your boss ok. I wouldn’t have told u only about the mistake right?

Me: I know i know. Sorry lah… but… really can’t find the mistake leh. Can u tell me pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease?

Client: Sigh. Look at your first row first column.

Me: *GASP* The date! I keyed in the wrong date! Argh… sooo sorry. I’ll re-do and send the spreadsheet to u again k?

And so i did. Sent the amended spreadsheet to my client, and apologised profusely again in my email.

Told Iceman & Zounds about it and they both said i’m lucky i’m a gal. ‘Cos if i were a guy, my client would probably have gone straight to my boss. Heh.

A song without meter and rhyme

I sent the sms but the reply came from another. Sigh. Listening to Tanya Chua’s I’ll Remember You very very softly in office now. Sigh. Will upload the music when i’m home. 🙂  



I’ll Remember You

Sorry wasn’t good enough
A song without meter and rhyme
A long forgotten promise I recalled I made to you
A candle flame dies in the wind
It looks like it’s about to rain, about to rain

Spirals from your cigarette
Your sweet cologne on my pillow
Messages you left me still sing like some lullaby
Pretty pictures on the wall
Hopes in us will rise & fall, rise & fall

And in the rain
In summer days too
When the willow tree weeps too
Under the street light so bright
I’ll remember you everyday

The plane leaves in an hour’s time
Hold me till our last goodbye
Silence is the only sound
No words can speak it through
I’ll breathe your breath for one last time
You’ll be strong and so will I, so will I

And in the rain
In summer days too
When the willow tree weeps too
Under the street light so bright
I’ll remember you
I’ll remember you
I’ll remember you