There’re some people in my office with really bad English. We all know of Kid’s Meal’s infamous "quitted"… and then there’s Smarties’ way of pronouncing "claim" – "craim". I heard a new one today. The Esplanade’s "wishing spheres" for the new year have been renamed the "wishing spears".
Reminds me of an ex-colleague at an ISP helpdesk I used to work at. He used to get his "r" and "l" sounds mixed up. So if his name is "Clive", he would introduce himself as "Crive", for example. I remember there was once when I was still new to the helpdesk… and so I sat in as he answered calls as part of my training. One of the calls was from this lady who couldn’t connect to the Internet or something and this was what he said to her:
"ISP Helpdesk, this is Crive speaking. To troubleshoot, can you please open your blouser".
I wonder if the lady was offended…