Accidental Fierceness

Went to the airport for dessert after cellgroup on Wednesday. While queuing up near the entrance of the toilet, a middle-aged woman in her 40s & an elderly woman in (probably) her 60s walked in, and walked right past me. I stared at the 2 women and wondered if i should just let them cut my queue… had it just been the elderly woman, i probably would have closed an eye… but i was quite annoyed with the middle-aged lady!Just then, the cubicle door in front of the middle-aged woman opened & she was about to walk in when i blurted out in Chinese, “Wah! No need to queue up uh?”. The hostility in my voice surprised even myself.

The middle-aged woman looked at me in surprise & turned to look at the elderly woman. The elderly woman told her to go ahead. That puzzled me a bit but I ignored their exchange & made my way towards the opened door. The middle-aged woman then said to me, “I was here first”.

Instinctively, i turned to her and replied, “I was queuing up over there (gestured towards the door) when you came in.” Again, my tone was curt & harsh. I could also feel my eyes widening in aggression & glaring at the woman.

She took a step in retreat & apologized hastily. Wow. I must’ve looked really fierce. It’s not everyday that one successfully cower aunties into submission. Hehe. Didn’t mean to & certainly didn’t feel that much malice towards her but i didn’t apologize. I mean since i’ve chosen to assert my right, no point being apologetic about it right?

Thinking about the incident now reminds me once again that i sometimes lack nuances in my tone & expressions… which has always been my problem in leading a team of people. I either become too soft, or too harsh when enforcing rules & guidelines. Just like what i wrote about being too blunt & blatant in expressing my displeasure about people on my blog, words often escape my mouth (or keyboard) before i have time to soften them.

It is really not easy to exert your right gently. The easy way out would be to give it up (but that may not be the right way either) or bulldoze people over. It is easier to achieve a balance at work ‘cos one can just maintain a distant “professional” stance but among friends? That’s the toughest part. Sometimes i force myself to suppress my unhappiness & feelings of betrayal. “For the greater good” i tell myself. But that is a lie too ‘cos ultimately, the unhappiness will gnaw away at the friendship & once too much time has lapsed, that friendship is also gone.

Have you lost any friends this way?

Pinky then & now

Pinky & Fatty when they were 1 day old.

Not difficult to guess why Pinky was named thus huh?

A little bit more fur, a little less pink.

Pinky learning to crawl.

She used to sleep up to 2 hrs in my hand!

Pinky & me – hanging out together.

Pinky after a towel down.

Clown carrying Pinky.

Pinky on a leash.

Sleeping on my lap.

Pinky & her lop-sided ears.

Adventurous Pinky!

Are u looking at me?

Side-parting

Pinky has really grown up. She eats damn a lot too… too much i think… but i can’t stop my dad from feeding her so much. He keeps topping up her hay & pellets once they’re finished. It’s like 24hr buffet for Pinky. (I just removed the plate of pellets from her bungalow. Heh.)

My dad said that Pinky didn’t want to drink milk tonight… which is a first. Apparently Horlicks licked Pinky & stood still as usual for Pinky to crawl under her to drink milk but Pinky kept running away. Sigh. Maybe it’s Pinky’s way of saying, “i’m not a baby anymore!”.


Soon it’ll be time to shift Pinky outdoors with her mommy. I feel so sad ‘cos that means i won’t be able to pop down in the middle of the night just to take a quick peek or to play with Pinky (too troublesome to have to disable the house alarm & unlock all the doors to go outside to play for 5mins kind of thing). I patted Pinky & told her that she’ll have to shift house soon… downgrade from her good class bungalow to a cage outdoors.


Pinky’s still very adorable… and she still sleeps on her back, on my lap. Her ears are funny though… heh. She sports a “side-parting”…. her right ear flops down by the side of her face, but her left ear is like combed over to the right side. Hard to describe… take a look at the pictures to get a better idea ya?

Sigh… guess Pinky’s my favourite bunny ‘cos i took care of her since birth. I’m like her nanny cum maid cum chauffeur. Horlicks is my next favourite ‘cos Horlicks is very personable & likes to hang around humans. Muah Chee, Coffee & Peanut are cute too… but my dad spends more time with them so they’re closer to my dad. Coffee & Peanut especially… they don’t really let me pat them unless they’re already lying down to rest. I still think MC looks like a big stuffed toy ‘cos he has really chubby cheeks – like a chipmunk! Heh. I think Pinky will grow up to be a real goodlooking rabbit. As it is, her fur coat has a nicer shade of brown than Horlicks… and of she inherits some of MC’s features, she’ll look darn cute!

🙂 P for Pinky! Pretty pretty Pinky!