Projection of Ourselves

My cellgroup is currently doing a study on spiritual gifts and one of the points the author of the book we’re covering brought up was that we shouldn’t project our gifts onto others, e.g. if you can speak in tongues, that’s good, but you shouldn’t condemn another person who can’t speak in tongues as being any less a believer.

Likewise, I think mothers shouldn’t project their love of babies onto others.  A friend who’s a new mother made this remark recently.  She said to me, “AA gave birth this year, I also had a baby, now CC is pregnant – we’re all waiting for you to have a kid!”

The thought that went through my mind when she said that was – duh?  I’m not saying I’ll never have a child but I think her statement can be construed as slightly offensive because she assumed everyone wanted to have babies, and made it sound as though you need to have a child in order to complete your life.  Well, heck no!  *Rolls eyes*. 

Although I didn’t take offence at what she said, I just hate it when people make such general assumptions.  Just like I hate it when people always ask husbands / boyfriends things like, “Did you drive?”, etc.  Duh?  Why the assumption that it’s the guy that drives or owns a car?  I REALLY hate this sort of gender biases.

So here’s my note to all mothers.  Just keep your love to yourself.  Seriously.  I’m freaked out as it is that there’s going to be strange kiddos (my tolerance and patience for children extend only to children of people I know) running around our flat during our Christmas party.  I really hope they don’t damage the paint or furniture or our newly laid parquet floor (I’m seriously considering laying a canvas sheet over the floor in the spare room and locking all the children there).  Argh.  Imagine the dirt and germs thy bring.  Eck!  Even if I’m the host, I won’t hesitate to smack any offending youngling.

Hmm… or maybe we should just lock them up in the balcony… the tiles there are less prone to damage…

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November 2009