The Tiny Voice of the Heart

Not too long ago, i attended this training where the trainer spoke about the conscious & unconscious mind. The trainer believed that people found it extremely difficult to break old habits because no matter what their conscious mind told them to do, their unconscious mind would always act to steer them back to their old nature.

I agree with what the trainer said though i call it the heart vs. the mind. I realised a long time ago that even if your mind can think through a situation and come up with the most logical, most rational decision that you should take, as long as your heart tells you to go the opposite direction, chances are, you would head the way your heart told you to. The bottomline is, if you followed the decision of your mind, even if everything turned out fine, you would always still question and ask yourself, “what if…” But if you followed your heart’s decision, even if it turned out to be a mistake, you would still not regret it.

Ever since i came to this conclusion, i’ve always tried to listen to my heart. The best way of listening to what your heart is telling you is this: toss a coin. That’s because if the toss affirms what you really want in your heart, you’ll be very happy to follow through with the results. However, if the toss was against what your heart wanted, then you would probably want to toss again, and again, till the outcome matched what your heart wants. Point is, the result of the toss isn’t the main thing that you’re trying to find out… it just gives that tiny voice inside you a loudspeaker to shout what it wants to say.

That said, i’m afraid i’ve not been very good at listening to what my heart wants in recent years. This is especially true in the work arena, where it is often easier to take the path of least resistance. To just go with a job that feeds you, rather than something that you could do with much passion. And as time goes by, i think the tiny voice inside me developed a chronic sore throat ‘cos it’s barely audible.

I know that tiny voice used to be a very stubborn thing. It would go against the world if it had to, just to guard its beliefs. Nowadays, it does flare up occassionally… make that very occassionally. But it has mellowed to the extent that i don’t recognize it anymore.

And so i’ve decided to embark on a journey to find that tiny voice. I actually miss its stubborness, its persistence, and its uncompromising stance on what it sets its sight on. I think coupled with a slightly more matured mind now, that voice might sing a better song than what it used to.

Strepsils anyone?

Blog Videos

Ah… i finally got round to looking for websites to host videos, so that i can air them here. Wasn’t sure whether to choose between Youtube or Google Video so i decided to sign up for both. I tried Google Video first & the uploader tool is really user friendly for a first-timer like me. You can upload multiple files at a time too… but… but… they don’t accept .3gp files!! And the more recent videos taken with my hp are in that format.

Disillusioned, i decided to try my luck with Youtube… and TADA!! Thankfully, Youtube accepts .3gp format so heh. Youtube has my patronage!

Anyway, i’m going to post 4 different videos of Pinky… from when he was scchhmall little baby to the big boy he is now. Heh. Enjoy!!

Politics & Mindset

I’ve always been quite bo chup (apathetic) about politics and though i’ve openly declared that i’ll be voting for the PAP in this year’s General Election, i’ve never tried to convince anyone else to do the same. Likewise, i expect not to be badgered to vote for the opposition because i feel that who you vote for is something you ought to think about carefully, and come up with a decision of your own.

I admit that sometimes, i feel that the PAP can be a little high-handed in the way they handle things… but hey, even LKY has said that there is no level playing field in politics right? I mean, i look at my own situation – the developer of the project i’m selling got another agency in to be our joint marketing agent and i’m all out to kill them (you won’t believe the number of ways i’ve devised to get rid of them!)… what more to expect in politics!?!

If the opposition keeps making stupid mistakes, then who can they blame for their folly? I mean, if they wait so many years for another shot at winning a seat in parliament, only to be done in by their own error, then too bad right? You can’t expect the ruling party to sayang (dote) them on their heads & say, it’s ok, go on and fight me?

And if their “carelessness” was part of a more elaborate scam to discredit the government and/or the election organisers, then just too bad that they were found out. Live up to the consequences i say!

Anyway, this post isn’t about that. You go vote for whoever you want. And i’ll vote for my PAP. This post is about the mindsets of some people i’ve spoken to recently. It appears to me that quite a number of people who have said that they’ll be voting for the opposition, are voting only because they want an “opposition voice” in parliament. They want PAP to win overall, but they want a few opposition MPs inside to keep the ruling party on its toes.

I don’t agree to that. I feel that you should vote for a person / party based on its merits, and not for the sake for “having an opposition” around. I think this applies to all things. I would never do something just for the sake of doing it. I would only do something because i believed in it.

It’s also scary as i hear some people gripe on and on about how bad the gahmen has treated them and all i see is their inertia to improve their own lives at fault. We are all smart thinking adults. You can’t blame the government for everything that happens, and for your lot in life because you were lazy / ill-disciplined / foolish, and hence did not get very far in life.

I say instead of complaining to the air, take action and improve your own life. Take charge because no one owes you a living. When i see “aunties” & “uncles” complain mindlessly about how bad the gahmen has treated them, i try to just walk away because i see no point in arguing with people whose minds are shut. But what made me concerned enough to write about this, is that i saw a good number of young people, who should jolly well know better, complain about the same things!

So it bugs me. It bugs me that some Singaporeans are not willing to be responsible for their own lives, choosing instead to blame the government for everything, and ungratefully forgetting all that the government has done.

Sigh… i don’t know how my generation is going to turn out. I hope we don’t screw up so bad that we squander away all that our forefathers have slaved for. These are difficult times.


Brickbats & Bouquet(s)

Sigh… i got into another tussle with Singtel. Sheesh, if only i could get into an exercise routine as regular as these fights!!

Anyway, i’m tired of having to repeat my entire story here, so i’m just going to copy & paste my latest email to Singtel.

Oh btw, there is a happy ending. (Disclaimer: So far) 😛

Date: May 4, 2006 1:49 AM
Subject: Of brickbats & bouquets

Dear Sirs,
I have sent numerous brickbats to Singtel over the past month because of misrepresentation and lousy service given by Singtel staff. I am glad to say that I can finally send an email to Singtel, to compliment one of your staff.
Two nights ago, a friend of mine sent 2 MMS to me but I never received them. Out of the blue, I received 2 SMS from Singtel tonight saying that there are 2 MMS waiting for me at the IDEAS website and they were the 2 MMS that my friend sent 2 nights ago.
I called Singtel 1626 and spoke to a Prakesh (I did not not quite catch his name though I did record our conversation) and he was not helpful at all. He suggested that the reason for my not receiving the MMS was because my phone settings were wrong. But this was not possible because I have been receiving and sending MMS the past month since getting my phone. He then suggested that perhaps the MMS my friend sent was bigger than 6M and hence my phone was unable to receive them.
After getting off the line with Prakesh, I checked with my friend and she said that the MMS she sent to me was only 26KB. This was verified when I logged into the IDEAS website and saw that the picture she sent was approximately 27KB.
I then called 1626 again and spoke to a lady called Vijay. Vijay said that she would do a line reset and asked me to power off and on my phone in 2 mins, after which, I was to send a test MMS to myself. I told Vijay that I would do as instructed but I rejected the idea of sending a test MMS to myself. Why should I pay for a test MMS if this was a Singtel problem? Vijay said that this was a very common problem with MMS users and that the fault lies with my handphone.
This was illogical to me because if the fault was with my handphone, then how does Singtel resetting the line help my handphone? Anyway, I requested that Vijay send a test MMS to me again and she agreed to do so. Thus I waited… I waited for 19min from 11:46pm to 12:05am and there still was no MMS.
So I called 1626 a third time. This time, I spoke to Gary Liew. At first, he also insisted that he could not send me any test MMS because there were “no phones allowed” in his office. I asked to speak to Vijay again and to my alarm, she had knocked off!! How could she be so irresponsible as to make an empty promise to a customer and then run off because her shift was over?? When I was working for a similar helpdesk, I always made sure that I followed-up with all outstanding customer requests before leaving the office!
Anyway, after much insistence on part, Gary still said that he could not send any MMS during his shift. I asked to speak to his supervisor, who was unfortunately on the phone. When his supervisor (Julia) did not return my call within 15min, Gary called me back to explain that she was still on the line but he got her permission to send a test MMS using my IDEAS web portal, and waive off the cost of that MMS.
And so the test MMS was finally sent, and I received it. What I want to highlight is that Gary’s attitude was definitely positive. He did not show any signs of frustration at me, an irate customer, and he was responsible enough to follow up my request with his supervisor. So although I was very pissed by the first 2 CSOs I spoke to, I think Gary managed to resolve the issue and at least convert me to a happy customer once again.
Please send my thanks to Gary. Thank you.

Cosmetic Surgery

Was feeling kind of bored so i decided to totally redo my blog! Got this template from Blogger Templates and customised it a bit. There are a couple of really impressive designs there (i downloaded the Jacksonville, Taipei, Singapore’s skyline, and the Esplanade too!)… with simple instructions on how to adopt the template for your blog.

Go check it out if you’re interested in customizing your blog too ya?

Decided to change the song again (yeah, i know, the last one wasn’t on for very long) to get into the HK mood. Don’t ask me why but somehow my intuition attaches this “HK feel” to this song. It’s by Hacken Lee, aka Li Ke Qin and the song is called 再一次想你 (translated Thinking of You Once Again). It was the themesong for this TVB serial, Street Fighters (庙街妈兄弟). Interesting show. I thought Hacken Lee was just so macho in the show. Haha.

Anyway, the bunnies scored another goal yesterday… but i’ve run out of creative photo ideas so.. heh… till i think of some more… no more bunny sequels. 😛


Ok… some have asked why i used the pic of HK’s skyline when i’m not a Hongkonger, nor am i residing in HK… well, i just wanted a blue/purple/pink theme and this matched the requirement can?

Besides, i love HK! I love the language, the food, the shopping, the culture… hey, i even tried applying for jobs there ok!

It was a tough decision between this HK skyline theme & the esplanade one lah. I think the esplanade one gels together better… looks better on the whole… but somehow i just felt that this HK one was the best for now… and so it’s up.

Plus, no matter how patriotic i am, it’s too tedious… way way way too tedious to change the template again tonight! No way!!

So there. Live with it.

Out with the old, in with the new…

A long time ago, i wrote about ICQ vs MSN. Now, i think it’s finally a foregone conclusion that ICQ is heading the way of the dinosaurs.A friend of mine recently introduced me to Live Messenger. This is the latest beta version of MSN messenger. It looks pretty much similar to the regular MSN except that you can:
1) Send offline msgs (finally!) to your friends.
2) Go into invisible mode and still msg the friends you want to talk to (just like ICQ’s invisible mode).
3) Share certain files with your friends.

Live Msgr is part of this whole new MSN web concept… you can check out the homepage here. allows you to totally customise the homepage to include content that you’re interested in. Excellent concept.

So now with all the cute animated emoticons and offline msg feature, what more can i complain about? Yes, i still prefer ICQ’s msg by msg format… but i guess i could make that small sacrifice & use MSN as my main IM. After all, most of my friends are using it already. (Though i still feel deeply for ICQ… sentimental value u know… it has served me faithfully for many years!)

Once again, an iconic program of my youth is becoming obsolete… sigh. Makes me feel old…


Fantastic! The same person who intro’d me to Live Msgr just pointed out the last redeeming factor of ICQ – it’s a lot easier to send a msg to several users at one go. Cool! Heh. 😛