A series of unfortunate events

Just not feeling very good about this weekend. Am glad it’s over. Heard some unhappy news and had some unpleasant dreams.

Over the past month, I spent quite a few of my weekends chatting with this “elder” at the showflat. He’s in semi-retirement having made good in business, and spends quite a bit of his time in church work now. Ginger is Catholic and through his sharings, i realised that the basic fundamentals of Protestants and Catholics aren’t that different. He is also an avid driver of the Alpha Programme in his church.

As Ginger is a lot older than me, i’ve grown to respect him a lot through our chats. But last week, i found out that he actually told some of the agents who are working for my company, that they are welcomed to join his company anytime. Sure, contractually agents are independent contractors and they can choose to hop to any company they want. But it doesn’t feel right that my agents are being poached in the showflat. He may have said that it is their choice, but to allow this when both our companies are stationed at the same project doesn’t seem very sound ethical…. at least not to me.

Ginger doesn’t know that i’m aware of what’s going on. None of the agents know actually… they would not have guessed that their agent in-charge is my good friend and hence she told me about this. I was going to talk to Ginger about this, well, hint to him that this wasn’t an appropriate thing to do but he didn’t come to the showflat this week. I’m disappointed in how this has turned out. Perhaps this is how people are in business.

If you have ever learnt any programming language, you will surely come across this phrase, “if then else”. I like it when i know the “if then else” that i am going to take in any particular situation ‘cos it helps me move forward. Once you know the options available to you, and you decide in advance what are the various actions you will take when a particular scenario happens, you can easily deal with it ‘cos you have pre-decided what course of action to take.

Recently, Patience met an old friend of hers, Mr. Carrot. Patience and Mr. Carrot go way back… they used to study togther when they were younger. Zounds will find the name Mr. Carrot familiar ‘cos Patience has always been bugging him to get Mr. Carrot for her. Anyway Patience has always had latent feelings for Mr. Carrot and having met him again recently, she asked him out. Unfortunately, Mr. Carrot declined her offer. Perhaps he knows how she feels and doesn’t wish to encourage her feelings.

So i came home yesterday to find Patience sulking on my bed. I explained to her that i won’t be able to find her the right rabbit if she keeps harping on Mr. Carrot. I mean, if he’s already the “perfect rabbit” in her mind, how would “anybunny” else measure up?

Patience is in quite a quandary now. I told her that God, in His perfect timing, will find her the right rabbit. I’m not saying it couldn’t be Mr. Carrot.. just that perhaps they’re both not ready for each other yet. Patience asked me for some “if then else” action plan that she can stick to. I told her that this time, i don’t know if it’s a good thing to map out what steps she might want to take. Perhaps when it comes to affairs of the heart, it’s better to wait for God to act, instead of grabbing strongly onto our own “if then else”.

Weather Report
I’m the sort who gets really affected by my dreams. If i have a happy dream, i can wake up feeling sky high the whole day. But when i have an unpleasant dream, i wake up with an equally heavy heart that burdens me throughout the day. This weekend, i’ve not had very good dreams. Usually when i’m feeling down, i like to go to sleep ‘cos i usually feel better when i wake up (i think one tends to look at things more negatively when the mind/body is tired) but i’ve been waking up feeling rather sad. Once again, it’s time to deal with the reality of dark skies.

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June 2005